


for every question why (gabemoth was our because)

by sae_what



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Forbidden Love, Holding Hands, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Nathalie Sancoeur Does Not Get Paid Enough, Requited Love, Selfcest, Sentimonster Gabriel Agreste, getting nauseous brb, hand kissing, i 'm not proud of myself either and i'm regretting this a lot, i hate this, you thought Adrichat was cursed? have some G A B E M O T H
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:13:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28099740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sae_what/pseuds/sae_what
Summary: Hawkmoth realizes that any sacrifice is worth taking if it means Gabriel Agreste gets to stay with him.
Relationships: Gabriel Agreste/Hawkmoth - Relationship
Comments: 38
Kudos: 27





	for every question why (gabemoth was our because)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missnoodles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missnoodles/gifts).



> I blame Noodles for this, _entirely._

It stung Hawkmoth to see Nathalie in this condition. It stung him to see the purple-blues of her feathered skirt, fluttering to the beat of the magic as she transformed, as she gave him an impressionable smile. Sacrificing her health for the sake of Hawmoth’s cause.

But no feelings of overwhelm could compare to the time when Mayura had summoned her most recent sentimonster.

“This sentimonster will trick them. This will work,” Mayura spoke weakly, the smile still plastered on her face. A smile still present, but becoming more and more forced the sicker she became.

“Nathalie, you...” Hawkmoth’s concerned words trailed off as his eyes trained from Mayura to...

Himself.

“Hello, Hawkmoth.”

It spoke in a cold tone, a tone that he never thought anyone else could imitated so accurately.

Of course _this_ sentimonster could, though.

Hawkmoth’s crusty lips curled to a malicious smile, his evil tone becoming irresistible even for his sentimonster self.

“Yes. This ought to do. This will fool the kids, they’ll never suspect I was the one behind all this.”

Hawkmoth rested his hand gently on Gabriel’s (or.. his own?) shoulder, giving him an encouraging smile. “You’ll become a good asset to the team, Gabriel. Welcome.”

Nathalie coughed quietly, and gave Hawkmoth a painfully hard grin.

* * *

Gabriel had just come into this world, and there was a lot that he had to learn. But he quickly grew knowledge of most things, and he learned them through the eyes of Hawkmoth.

How cruel the world was. How his wife was taken away from him.

And how the world disgraced him with such pain that he didn’t deserve.

Hawkmoth felt he was worthy of the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous, if only it meant it would bring his wife back, bring her back to his side, and the world would be whole again.

And any sacrifice, to Gabriel, was worth it if it meant that Hawkmoth was happy.

Because Hawkmoth made _him_ happy. He made him feel worthy, made him feel at home. He had only been in this world for a few days, and he already knew he could trust Hawkmoth with his life.

Nothing could possibly rip them from them.

Except, as Gabriel saw Nathalie grow weaker under the magic that he, a sentimonster, was under, he began to grow more fearful.

“Hawkmoth,” Gabriel began. He never liked calling Hawkmoth by his own name. It felt odd to do so, since Gabriel had always thought of Hawkmoth as separate from him.

But not necessarily separate. Because all at once, they shared _something_ together. Other than their looks and their voice, there was something _more_ between them, and Gabriel could feel it.

But Nathalie’s sickness would test what was really going on between the two of them.

It would shatter Gabriel to pieces, just thinking about how Hawkmoth could dispose of him, any minute.

“Hawkmoth,” Gabriel repeated, voice beginning to tremble. “Nathalie is becoming more and more sick as we speak.”

Hawkmoth, both hands resting on the casket of his wife, did not speak. His head hung low, and Gabriel couldn’t make out his expression, but knowing he was looking down at his wife, he knew he felt a bit of pain.

Gabriel knew that he couldn’t spare Nathalie’s life if it meant she would end up like Emilie.

But Gabriel couldn’t dare let Hawkmoth think this.

“I know, Gabriel,” Hawkmoth finally spoke, his stern voice sending chills up Gabriel’s spine.

Hawkmoth stood straight and finally, he turned to Gabriel, striking eyes meeting his as he brushed his familiar yet cold fingertips on his cheek.

“I’ll figure something out.”

* * *

This wasn’t right.

Hawkmoth knew that what he was doing required him to accept that he would have to make sacrifices.

But having Gabriel here added so many new complicated layers.

He knew what he was fighting for. He was fighting for the life of his wife.

His wife was stubborn. Even so, he knew she loved him back to a degree. And he loved her. But Nathalie too... she was so dedicated to Hawkmoth’s cause, and he could never take it for granted. They have both understood him, and he unmistakably cherished them.

But could they ever keep a lone man company?

Then Gabriel came. _His_ Gabriel.

He understood him more than anyone in his life ever had. And that was saying something.

Gabriel had no job other than just _existing_. He would be present whenever Hawkmoth would release another akuma, in the hopes that no one would ever suspect that Hawkmoth and Gabriel were the same person.

But even for Hawkmoth, the lines started to blur.

Unlike him, Gabriel was pure and kind, despite his stoic first impression. He was naive, and although he had learned much from Hawkmoth, he still didn’t quite understand how the world worked.

Except... he understood how _Hawkmoth_ worked.

When Hawkmoth would wallow in grief, about his wife, about how horrible of a father he was, about how he would never succeed to retrieve the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous... Gabriel was there. And almost always, Hawkmoth stood in shock, the way that Gabriel would comfort him after a bad day... The way that he understood him, so _perfectly_.

“When you’re in pain, I’m in pain too, Hawkmoth,” Gabriel’s eyes began to pool with hot tears. “Please. I just want you to be happy. Tell me what to do so you can be happy.”

Hawkmoth couldn’t take this any longer.

He took Gabriel by the hand. His soft, warm hand. Hawkmoth allowed him to wrap its warmth around his cold hands.

“You existing has made me happy, Gabriel. And for the longest time, I have never felt so happy.” He brought Gabriel’s knuckles up to his lips. “The least you can do for me is stay.”

Seeing a smile slowly appear on Gabriel’s face, Hawkmoth’s heart leaped.

His words were true. In this moment, he was at his happiest.

And any sacrifice was worth the risk if it meant Gabriel would stay by his side.

**Author's Note:**

> i don’t think the universe will ever forgive me for writing this, so... gonna bury myself alive now. :)))))


End file.
